Will is 5 months old!

Will is 5 months old now! This is what he is up to these days:

- He is able to get himself across the room if he sees some of Cohen's toys that he wants. I might not call it crawling, but it's kind of this downward dog then bunny hop that he does. It's pretty cute. 

- He is very interested in food. Our doctor told us to go ahead and start solids at 5 months, so we have been letting him have a taste of whatever we are having. I am still exclusively breastfeeding, though these days it's only every 3.5-4 hours or so. 

- He giggles the most for his brother, and basically wants to be doing whatever Cohen is doing all the time. He is also so smiley. He smiles at strangers everywhere we go. People are constantly talking to him when we are out and about. Strangers love to comment on his hair. He has so much of it! 

(see Cohen's 5 month update here)

(see more pics on my instagram @jrnielsen110)

Our allergy journey continues....

When Cohen's peanut allergy was extinguished (is that the right word? I'm not sure), the allergy doctor told us his little brother would almost certainly need allergy testing when he was born. So, I brought him in for his first appointment today. 

(chilling in the waiting room) 

Will is almost 5 months old, and we have been letting him taste our food once in a while for the past few weeks. Last week I let him taste a smoothie that had peanut butter in it. And his face broke out in hives. So stressful!!! So today, when the nurse did the allergy testing, I wasn't surprised that one of the dots got really red and angry. So he is allergic to peanuts. Apparently younger siblings of allergic kids are 7 times more likely to have allergies.

I feel like I am learning more about allergies all the time. The doctor told me that dry skin is so so so bad for allergies. New studies show that if you keep your baby super moisturized, the allergies are on average 30% reduced. So crazy. So we are supposed to be coating Will in a moisturizer like Vaseline all the time, especially when he is eating, but actually all the time. And we have to keep him away from peanuts now so that he can start the allergy extinguishing process every two weeks for the next year or two or however long it takes. He has to get bloodwork next week to find out exactly how crazy the allergy is.

I feel like I am able to handle this so much better this time around. With Cohen, we just felt so strongly that there was something going on with him, and his physician kept telling us it was normal for a baby to have super red cheeks and dry skin. This time, we are starting much earlier with an allergist, which feels much better. Love this little guy.

142 days

So Will is 142 days old. The days have flown by of course, but also they have gone slow and been super intense and emotional. It's been about 9 months since our whole ordeal started, and I find myself so not over it. 

(one day old)

I'm not really sure what is normal when it comes to getting over something traumatic. What I know is I think about it every single day. Even though it is the worst thing that Jon and I ever went through, it seems like my brain doesn't want me to forget a single bit of it. So I replay the whole thing over and over, and sometimes I remember some little detail (like something a nurse said) that makes me want to go through the whole over again.

I'm so, so grateful. Will is the absolute best, really a dreamy smiley happy baby. When we go to the store, people come up to us constantly to tell us he is the sweetest baby they have seen. He is so friendly and outgoing. I feel so much joy when I look at him. And there might have been a parallel future without him in it, and that thought makes me sick to my stomach.

I don't ever want to forget about what happened but I don't want it to define me or Will either. I'm finding that balance.

Will and sleeping lately

Will is over 4 months old now, and he has basically been the dream baby when it comes to sleep. But last week, he officially became too big for the bassinet he had been sleeping in beside me, so we figured we would try him in his crib in his own room which is right beside our room. Well, it's been a mixed bag, but mostly, I am getting no sleep. I think I'm averaging maybe 3-4 hours altogether per night. I've started recording the wake ups, for some reason I can't remember, which just makes it worst. 

Getting no sleep is so hard!! I feel tired at first, but then I feel like my body adjusts to it somewhat. So basically where we are right now is Will does not want me to put him down ever while he is sleeping at night. I did a bit of googling and discovered he is exactly 19 weeks, which puts him in a wonder week/sleep regression which has apparently been documented extensively.

Jon and I also recently listened to a This American Life about how sleep deprivation is so common in the Navy. So crazy what lack of sleep can do to you.

My mom friends and I often talk about how isolating and lonely being a mom of a baby can be, and I think that whole thing is compounded when you are tired. I really am loving spending lots of time with this sweet little face, and also I find it super challenging. I am really lucky because Will is in a good mood most of the day and Cohen is super helpful. I feel for all the tired parents out there.